Addiction Abort! Farewell FarmVille

FarmVille has taken over my life.

I wake up in the morning wondering when I have to plow my fields. I go to bed at night thinking about which crops to plant. I’m sending gifts, receiving gifts, trawling around my email accounts and Facebook contacts wondering who I can convince to join me as a neighbor.

I think I’ve lost my mind!Its not that I’m totally free of addictions. Sudoku, for instance. I became a fan only in the last year and I’m definitely addicted. There’s nothing more glorious than lying in bed in the early morning or late night with pen, paper and a challenging Sudoku game. If its late at night, and the light bothers your husband who is trying to sleep – well that’s a problem. But other than that MINOR point, its a very harmless addiction.

Then there’s food. I love it. I work with it – creating recipes, writing cookbooks – food is a very big part of my life. Definitely an addiction. And since I can’t live without food, I guess its an addiction I’m going to have the rest of my life.

But Farmville? Who needs this? How did this happen???

I was in Spain, at a food photo festival. I met a lovely woman and we became fast friends. She started to talk to me about FarmVille and she glowed as she spoke. It sounded like the perfect way to combine creativity, brains, friendly competition, camaraderie, and fun. Planting! Building! Buying! Shopping! Animals! Flowers! Trees! Wardrobe Changes! Facial feature changes! Who could resist?

So I entered the website, gingerly and cautiously. I tried to understand how its played – couldn’t. As far as I could see – they don’t really give you instructions. You’re just supposed to jump in. So I did. All was fine, plowed a little,  planted a little, harvested a little… and then it happened! I was awarded a Swiss manor! It was big and luxurious looking. How could I not accept it?

The thing is – its fun. You’re learning about different kind of sheep, and types of trees (when the cherries blossom on the the cherry trees its so gorgeous), and building types. Its a lesson in real estate and money management. Its everything combined into one colorful, delightfully drawn game.

But my life is at stake here.

As some people know, I’m trying to finish my first novel. Its been edited and re-edited – by the best out there. Its been set into InDesign and is waiting for formatting. Once that’s done, its off to the printer – and hopefully into waiting hands everywhere. But instead of tackling that job, I’m busy with chickens laying eggs and haunted houses needing nails. Do you see how insane this is?

I’m not the only one with this pesky pastime. Many people I know are addicted. You should see their farms! Huge! With mansions, and coops, and stone fountains, and tractors and combines, and seeders and harvesters, and fields and fields of crops and flowers. And by the way – I know what they’re doing when they’re supposed to be doing something else. Below the game, you can see what your friends are up to – when they’ve planted, what they’ve planted.

Professor – are you paying attention? I got those emails from you saying you’re going to skype me and we’ll talk about our new food blog.

But do you call? No!

Do you skype? No!

But do you FarmVille – YES!

Aha! I’m on to you!!!

Maybe I’ll do it cold turkey. Its hard – because there are crops that still need harvesting. Maybe I’ll wait till everything is harvested (then my cache of cash will be close to 50,000 – which is peanuts compared to some of my wealthy FarmVille neighbors). I can’t let the plantings die. (Although in real life you should see what a mess my garden is!).

All I know is that I’ve got to stop this. I’m an addict. I must withdraw. For the sake of my books. And my sanity.

Wish me luck.